I was ready for a second child a lot sooner than my husband. I wondered if he would ever be ready. When he was ready, we were older and that made things more difficult. Then God gave me a gift….
It was Christmas time. I was sorting gifts to give to kids and cousins. I held a shirt my husband had picked out for one of the cousins. I was going to set it on that cousin’s pile when in my head I heard, “Don’t give it away.” It was not scary or booming, just very clear. I believe that voice was God speaking to me. The shirt said “Big Sister”.
I believed God had given me a promise. I just had to trust Him. About 5 months went by. I became pregnant. This was the fulfillment of the promise! Until…it wasn’t. I had a miscarriage. I was very confused. God had promised me, and we all know that God doesn’t break promises. I was feeling pretty broken myself. More months passed. I read about and reminded myself of people in the Bible like Sarah who were much older than me and became pregnant.
Finally the next Christmas rolled around. I remember crying and writing in my journal and thinking - “this is not what I was expecting - did I make a mistake?”. Then in January I had a positive pregnancy test. This baby grew and was healthy. She was the promised one. When she was born, we named her after my husband’s paternal grandmother, Johanna. But, her middle name is Amaris. This means ‘promised one’ in Hebrew.
No comments:
Post a Comment